Connor Is Awesome

Was going through old bookmarks and came upon this doowzy.  Probably posted it before, but it was worth posting again.

Facebook’s a funny thing.  But another thing that’s funny is being in a relationship. But both things are funny for different reasons.  Facebook’s funny because a dude can let you know he “likes” True Blood, and can also have pictures of himself wearing a chain around his neck, like they were still in style.  The reason being in a relationship is funny is because it seems retarded to everyone who isn’t in one.  I’m no longer in a relationship, so the idea that someone would be is just goofy.  But give it 2 months, when summer’s over and my shirt doesn’t have to come off, and who knows, maybe i’ll be in one.  But one good thing about being in a relationship is that every relative of your significant other decides to facebook you.  Why is this good? Well, obviously because when the relatioship inevitably ends, you can still look at their cousins pictures on facebook and “use them for whatever”.

Also, yesterday I was shitting, and when one of those turds plopped out and into the water, water splashed back up and activated something on my sphincter and an eruption began.  Hadn’t had that happen in awhile.  I forgot how much I missed that.

Sea Isle Man-Week post will come soon.

We had video and picture documentation of the following event to prove that all the instances did in fact happen.  However, tequila decided to take over decisions, and the camera that held the proof was completely erased, before Franco could make the footage public knowledge.

And that is why Connor is Awesome is such an important website. It provides a way to correct mistakes of the past and to let the world know what happened.  So here is the only true and official account of the crabbing trip that went on Tuesday afternoon. Continue Reading »

Oh boy, oh boy! Bonner at the Bay is here.  Saturday to be exact.  Just got my ticket.  I look forward to it…I think.  To be honest, I’m not a fan of reunions.  The whole idea of acting like I care at all about these people who weren’t important enough for me to stay in touch with since high school just doesn’t exactly appeal to me.  Plus, all my best friends from my high school are living in the same house as me in sea isle.  And the people I would be interested in seeing I can’t imagine will go. 

One thing I do hope is to see a girl who should be there who’ve I had a falling out with.  She completely hates me, and I really want to see if I can work a hate-fuck out of the whole deal.  It’d just be cool.  Otherwise it’s going to be me getting obliterated in front of family and friends, getting rejected, and stumbling around everywhere.  I hope a fight breaks out, I don’t even care if I’m involved, I just think that be funny.  Even funnier if it was a black dude vs, a white dude.  That happened a lot at the trolley stop I feel. 

Here’s some Would You Rather’s:

• take a great shit or have horrible sex
• bang blake lively once a month for a year or once a day for a month
• know when you’re going to die or how you’re going to die
• have your dad walk in on you having sex with your mom or your mom walk in on you blowing  your dad

I will be crabbing next week.  I cannot wait. 

Amazon sure did hook me up this week. Kick-Ass and the Recovery vinyl I’ve been waiting for.  SWEETNESS…IN THIS HOUSE!!!

This dumb chick is rapidly making today the most viewed day in Connor Is Awesome history.  I wish I had funnier posts on the main page to keep the new visitors coming back.

On a side note, the phillies are in a rain delay, so I may watch kick-ass again.  great flick.

Friday night I went out to dinner, and then by the time I got home, watched a DVR episode of Friday Night Lights, and realized Ant wasn’t going to be texting me to drive down that night and I dozed off before I could head down late, late night.  So as a result I left early Saturday, leaving me only 3 days down (2 really, since Monday I just mope around because I have to return to reality).  This Saturday I was much more conscious than last week.  Where as I finished a bottle in a little under 2 hours, now I was determined to last through the day.  And what excitement awaited me at the end.  I went to happy hour (or crappy hour, as I so cleverly refered to it) with a couple chums to enjoy the Phillies game because we no longer get cable in our house.  I spilled 6 less 302’s this week.  So I’m back to normal.  Went back to the house after a couple hours to play everyone’s favorite drinking game, Shot NHL.  Went 0 for the night. Little bit buzzed.  Went to LaCosta for a delco reunion.  Things started going down hill.  So me and Dunn made an early exit.  A decision I would not soon forget.  Continue Reading »

Combining two of my favorite things, Punchline and Lost.

Other combos of music and tv i’d love to see:

• Houston Calls singing a song about Arrested Development
• Eminem singing a song about Mad Men
• Blink 182 singing a song about Friday Night Lights

I’ve probably listened to this song 500 times since Friday.  But it’s awesome. The dancing in the video, however, is insane.  And I don’t mean insane good, I mean the choreography had to be done by a lunatic.

…about rape at least.