Feb 05 2010
Women Just Can’t Drive
Remember when that chick hit that other chick with her car? And it was reported she claimed she lost control when she was changing a song on her ipod. Then everyone got all preachy about how dangerous it was for people to be using their ipods when driving. Then later it turned out the chick driving was like high, or drunk, or huffing, or something. And if I’ve learned one thing in my life it’s that the only thing worse at driving than a person who’s high, drunk, or huffing, is a woman who is driving and high, drunk or huffing.
I am a proud user of the ipod in the car. It holds about 10x’s as many songs as the cds in my cd changer can hold, plus i can put podcasts to listen to on it. Most podcasts take up a whole cd. So all those people who complained about ipod use in cars, you suck, and I apologize for saying this very delayed.
But since all these people could start facebook groups about petitions to make driving with ipods illegal, I’d like to propose my on petition. “It should be illegal for women to drive.” Think about it, guys. Have you ever been in a car with a woman driving, and felt safe? No. Not even close. They don’t look when changing lanes, they rarely use turn signals, they can’t parallel park. Then when they get pulled over, they have no idea what to do. They don’t know what insurance is, what their registration looks like, they just act dumb, but aren’t acting. God help them if a tire goes flat.
Statistically speaking women are responsible for 83% of accidents that occur each day.*
So take that for what it’s worth.
Save A Life, Don’t Let Women Drive.
*stat may not actually be true.