Hot chicks greatly affect my opinions.  A hot teacher once asked if I knew where an aquafina vending machine was because she didn’t like Dasani bottled water.  Ever since that day, I don’t like Dasani either.

Truth be told, crawling in the dark and running away weren’t horrible songs.  But still, what the hell are these 9 other songs they apparently have.  I assume they called it “Hoobstank’s Greatest Hits” because “Every Song by Hoobastank and Nine Songs By Bands That Sound Like Hoobastank” doesn’t have the same ring to it.

In all seriousness, here’s a video I thought would suck, but turned out to not hate.  It’s a bunch of movie dance routines set to Footloose.  Can’t argue with that. Worst comes to worst, you get to listen to Footloose.

Never Shout Never – First Dance

Connor’s Fund – Please, join me and say “no” to cancer.

Enjoy the best song you’re going to hear all summer (and maybe ever).

Wednesday

Because of prior commitments, I wasn’t able to get down the shore till about 4pm.  But 2 bottles of coke and a bottle of captain more than made up for that.  I arrived to find Ant and Dunn in the middle of a round of shots mario golf.  Diemedio was killin’ it and Dunn was paying the price.  Almost an entire bottle of smirnoff melon was gone.  They finished their round, we grabbed the rest of the smirnoff and a bottle of root beer vodka.  We got out the always enjoyable xbox 360, and started an internation tournament of shots nhl.  Arguably, it was the greatest thing to happen all summer.  As Slovakia surprised people and Peter Budaj became a household name, shot after shot was going through our systems.

After one round, it was time for a man-feast.  What better choice of food than Sean’s popcorn chicken Anytizers.  Dunn heated us all up a plate, and we munched away on the delectable little bites.  As fast as they were put down, they were devoured.  Dunn grabbed the sticks and the Czech’s put on an old fashioned butt whipping on him.  Needless to say, the shots of root beer vodka caught up to him and this was the result:

We went back to work.  Before long, we were out of root beer vodka.  We were faced with a decision.  We could go out, 3 suave motherfuckers like ourselves, and pull in some sweet poon, or we could finish what we started.  We grabbed another bottle of vodka, cherry, and unpaused the game.  Before long, the third bottle was finishing completion.  Sean came home, started yelling at us about how irresponsible we were, and what horrible friends we were for eating him popcorn chicken.

“I can’t believe I hang out with you faggots!”

“My mom was right about you dick-fucks!”

“I’d rather be friends with a black dude!”

These were just some of the hurtful things Sean said that night. Dunn left the room sobbing.  I chased after him to console him.

“Why does he have to be so mean?” Dunn asked me, wiping tears away from his eyes.

“He doesn’t try to be, Sean just has a bad temper, you know that.” I said to him, wiping away a single tear from Dennis’ cheek that he had missed.

“Look, don’t let him get to you.” I pleaded.  Dunn just kept his head down, visibly upset.

“Hey, I got an idea…how bout we go get some sliders?”

Dunn’s spirits perked right up and we put on our walking shoes and headed out for sliders.  They were delicious.  We bout a 6 pack of pounders each, drank 2 on the walk back, and then passed out with full beers in our hands when we got back to the house.

Sean went to bed, and Diemedio fucked around with my ear and our radio speakers.  Eventually, Ant passed out too.

Thursday

Thursday began with unfinished business.  We finished our international tournament, with Russia beating Canada I believe.  I don’t remember much of what happened during the day.  But I know we got bubble gum vodka from quaile and we drank that, then we went to 3dh.  Bradz brought around his girl and his girl’s friend.  We played survivor with her, and I fell to a record of 1-1, but on the bright side, she didn’t pick anyone.  Which benefited us all, because we joy floored it, and the girl was like crawling around on the joyfloor, and bathing in our sink. Quite gross.  Then the highlite of the summer came.  We all go ready to dance when I looked to the door and in came the wonderful Nancy.  Nancy begged us to be quiet, but we ignored her.  So she picked up a full trashbag and threw it at us.  Then she fell and busted her ass. I don’t know what happened to her after that.  But the cops came shortly after.  We just never answered the door.  The cops eventually left.  Victory.  Then it was time for bed.

Friday

We were supposed to go crabbing Friday.  We didn’t.  Not much fun stuff happened on this day.  Me and Dunn put a major hurting on Quaile and Ant in shot nhl.  Dunn, Pat, and I went to Shenanigans.  It was as fun as you’d expect. Lots of jack was drank. Headache and hangover would follow.

Saturday

Saturday brought man-week to a screeching halt as Jenna and Janet showed up.  No problem.  Keiran showed up and upped the manliness ten-fold.  We pregamed, and Dunn and Quaile wound up puking…before we went to happy hour. MEN!!!  We went to the OD for happy hour.  It was enjoyable.  Then we came home, drank some more.  We stole the girls vodka, finished it in 20 minutes by playing 4 vs. the computer on superstar. We got killed 13-0.  Vodka went bye-bye.  We filled it up with water.  We’re so awesome.  Then Diemedio did this:

Then we went to the springfield.  Springfield Saturdays!  Quaile did the beer monster, and didn’t get kicked out.  A total kick in the crotch.  Then Jenna and Janet got mad at pat for taking up a whole bed.  That pretty much symbolized the end of man-week.

Sunday

Sunday we got lunch.  That’s about it.  Then me, quaile, and diemedio raced home.  Quaile took 55, I took the expressway, diemedio took 55, but stopped for gas.  Traffic was horrendous on the spessway.  Quaile pulled out the victory by the slimmest of margins over me, and diemedio almost arrived almost seconds after I did.

It was an awesome week.

Does anyone know if Justin Timberlake is working on a new album yet?

Tonight will be my last nite using RCN cable and internet.  I become a comcast man tomorrow.  I’m excited, but nervous about the new path my life is taking.  I’m nervous about the guy coming to switch out my cable box though. I won’t be here when he is.  I feel like I should take pictures of my room to make sure he doesn’t steal shit.  Like if he steals my dvd copy of Yellowcard: Live in Concert, I probably won’t notice…until it’s too late.

So….new Nelly song? New Nelly song.